August 20th, 2010 ||
Posted by Allen Duty
Last Friday we considered Paul’s command to walk in love in Ephesians 5:1–15, and today we have the privilege of considering Paul’s commands to apply love to the church and to spouses. After today’s entry on Ephesians 5:15–33, we just have two more installments from chapter six and then we will begin our fall book study.
Verses 15–21
Paul exhorts the Ephesian believers to walk wisely as they watch their lives, redeeming the time. I don’t believe there are many of us who live in this manner. While we might have the goal of walking in wisdom, I think the majority of us walk with little reflection about how we have spent our time. Recently, Kendra and I took several hours to seriously consider our priorities and goals. Then we planned out each day of the week and made a schedule that would reflect those goals. After doing this with Kendra, I then did the same thing for my work schedule. I have noticed a big difference in efficiency and believe I am now more successful at redeeming the time. I encourage you to be diligent about your own life – don’t live in a reactionary way, responding to “crises” or allowing other people or factors to determine how you spend your day. Determine “what the will of the Lord is,” make a plan, and carry it out.
Then, Paul states that instead of being drunk (or filled) with wine, we should be filled (or drunk) with the Spirit. This verse is often used as a proof-text against drinking alcohol, but Paul did not intend it to be used in that way. He is contrasting one who is controlled by alcohol with one who is controlled by the Spirit. You should never be controlled by alcohol, but for that matter, you shouldn’t be controlled (or drunk) with money, success, people, status, academic accolades, or anything else. If we are filled with the Spirit, we will speak to one another in ways that honor God and others (v. 19). Further, we will submit to one another out of reverence for Christ, since that is fitting for people who are all filled with the same Spirit.
Verses 22–33
This passage is seen by many believers as the foundational text on Christian marriage, and rightly so. Paul begins by giving instructions to wives, asking them to submit to their husbands as to the Lord, since the husband is the head of the wife just as Christ is the head of the church. While asking wives to submit to their husbands seems like a revolutionary concept in post-1960s America, Paul’s readers would have hardly thought twice about the concept. Most likely, the Spirit inspired Paul to address the issue to ensure 1) There would be timeless biblical truth written for all generations that transcended cultural norms and 2) Married women would honor God and their husbands by adhering to pre-Fall biblical teaching about the roles of men and women (viz. that although men and women have equal worth in the eyes of God, they have been given complementary roles. For more on this, listen to Pastor Rusty’s teaching at the most recent men’s meeting).
The really revolutionary statements begin in verse 25. Here, Paul tells husbands to love their wives – and not in a loose, undefined sort of way. He tells them to love their wives “as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her!” None of Paul’s original readers would have been shocked by the teaching that women were to submit to their husbands; while some would have disagreed, no one would have been surprised or offended like they are today. But when Paul said that husbands should love their wives (as Christ loved the church, no less!), they probably had to pick their jaws up off the floor. In Greek and Roman culture (of which Ephesus was a part), women were seen as property, not as people made in God’s image. Seneca, a Roman philosopher who was a contemporary of the New Testament writers, wrote, “Women are married to be divorced and divorced to be married.” It is to these kinds of men that Paul says:
1. Love your wives as Christ loved the church
2. Wash your wives in the water of the Word
3. Present your wives holy and without blemish
4. Love your wives as your own bodies
5. Have only one wife because Christ only has one church, and marriage is a picture of the relationship between Christ and the church
6. Love your wives as your love yourselves
Revolutionary in AD 60, revolutionary in 2010. Men, how are you doing at loving your wife? Wait, don’t answer that. Schedule unhurried, uninterrupted time with your wife and ask her for an honest assessment. If you’ve been a harsh, critical, unloving husband in the past, your wife may not be very keen on sharing the truth with you. You need to repent of your selfishness and your other sins to her and take good notes on what she says. Your first job, after loving God with all your heart, soul, and mind, is to love your neighbor as yourself. There is no one nearer than your wife. Are you loving her like Paul says we must?